Posts in Dating

The TELEVISION Debut of the GROW Formula for Dating Apps

The GROW formula is growing.

This week I traveled from Washington DC to Phoenix Arizona to talk about finding love after divorce ON TELEVISION!

Despite recent 120-degree temperatures in Phoenix, when Arizona Daily Mix host Danielle Williams invited me to be a guest on her show I immediately booked a flight.

It was so much fun to be back on TV, and I’m excited to report the show’s producer eagerly invited me to return to share about my book, Dear Self, I Love You! Keep Going!, so you’ll definitely be seeing me on AZTV again later this year.

Here we are, Danielle Watson and Danielle Williams (the double D’s), talking about GROW and how to use dating apps to find love after divorce.

If you have single friends frustrated with dating after divorce share the GROW formula with them. The first class is free and it’s easy to sign up right here.

Love,

 

 

Are you ready to start dating again? 10 signs you should wait

Dating can temporarily relieve the pain and emotional distress we all feel when a relationship ends.

But, when we start dating to relieve sadness, loss, and rejection instead of to share the happy life we’re living, we end up participating in a cycle of emotional dependence that does not lead to happiness or a lasting relationship. (I know you know this but I’m reminding you because a broken or lonely heart makes us do strange and irrational things sometimes.)

The difficult emotions that accompany the end of a relationship are an opportunity to build our inner strength, for personal growth, and to develop our ability to self-soothe and practice emotional independence that few people chose to fully explore.

If you’re experiencing the signs below you’re definitely not ready to start dating again. Consider this a friendly sanity check just in case you were thinking about launching yourself out there before you’re really ready.

10 Signs You’re NOT Ready to Start Dating Again:

  1. You haven’t yet let yourself really feel all you are feeling because you are afraid of your emotions.
  2. You can’t imagine anything other than being in a relationship feeling normal or desirable.
  3. When you go to bed at night it still feels like the empty space beside you might roll over and crush you.
  4. You haven’t gone out socially with old friends or attempted to make new ones.
  5. You’re worried no one will ever really love you or want to be with you.
  6. You feel disconnected from the things that once brought you joy.
  7. You wonder if your single status is some kind of karmic punishment.
  8. You’re willing to have sex with someone who says they are not looking for a relationship in hopes that sex will change their mind.
  9. You swipe through dating apps not really sure what you are looking for.
  10. Happiness feels like something only someone else can bring to your life.

It’s tempting to jump back into dating as soon as a relationship ends, but there is so much wisdom and inner strength to be gained from waiting until you’ve had the chance to grow from that experience before starting to date again. Don’t miss out on this opportunity.

Being single isn’t always easy, but the feelings of confidence and self-love you will experience when you first succeed at finding happiness without depending on anyone else to make you happy are massive personal achievements. Trust me, these not only feel great but are sexy as hell, too!

Take the time to make yourself happy before you start dating again.

When you’ve done that, you’ll be ready to meet someone who is as wonderful to be in a relationship with as you are. I promise you will LOVE how that feels.

Are Dating Apps a Waste of Time?

You may have heard your single friends complaining that dating apps like Bumble and Tinder are a waste of time and that they’ve been using them for months but haven’t connected with anyone decent. What you need to understand is that this is happening to them because they are using dating apps incorrectly.

Dating apps are a powerful tool that almost no one understands how to use to meet the right person. This leads to wasting hours trying to meet someone (to no avail) which results in users feeling jaded about dating apps and even dating in general.

What this pint-sized anthropologist in a dress has noticed is people are using a tool that is as powerful as a magic wand as merely a back scratcher or a toothpick.

A dating app can perform the almost magical feat of delivering someone amazing and who wants to have a relationship with you right to your phone; but ONLY when you understand how to use it the right way!

It’s not the apps’ fault if people fail to recognize the power it holds or doesn’t use it correctly.

You can use a dating app to meet someone who would be an amazing partner for you and who will hold your hand under the table at dinner, text you first thing in the morning, and stand beside you through life’s inevitable ups and downs.

Some of the reasons your friends are not connecting with anyone decent:

  • They are missing the boat on when to ask for the date (timing is crucial) 
  • Their communication style is ineffective 
  • They don’t know what they are looking for (or looking at) when they swipe 
  • They are trying to play a game instead of being warm and genuine 
  • They are blaming the reason they are not meeting someone great on the lack of good people out there instead of realizing that the problem might be their own behaviors

Dating apps are not a waste of time. When you use my formula for dating apps, your worst problem could end up being having to choose which amazing person to meet in real life first.

There are 4 simple steps to using dating apps effectively and I have outlined these steps in my GROW formula.

Step 1: Give

Step 2: Receive

Step 3: Offer

Step 4: Win

When you go to make the offer to meet in Step 3, how you make it is the most crucial step. I’ll get you started connecting with the right people by providing you with Step 1 (Give) for FREE below.

If you find that the way I teach you to execute Step 1 feels good, I know you’ll be eager to buy the rest of the formula so you can learn the right way to offer to meet someone in person. But, start with the free class so you’re confident that this way feels more natural than what other people are telling you to do, ok?

There’s a lot of advice on how to date out there, but this formula absolutely works with dating apps and it will feel more comfortable and natural for both you and your match.

Someone amazing is just waiting for your swipe. Take the free class here because success never stopped meaning having someone to share it all with, did it? You’re ready, and I’ll bet it’s high time you put yourself back out there.

Love,

 

What Is The Difference Between Dating Apps and Online Dating?

Dating using an app today is different from dating online just 3 years ago.

If the last time you dated was before dating apps became popular in 2014, you may feel scared to create a profile, clueless about what to say about yourself, or frustrated by the endless messaging that doesn’t lead to meeting in person.

So, how are dating apps different from conventional online dating?

Technically, the difference between a dating app and online dating is that a dating app exists solely within the app on your phone or tablet instead of serving as a supplement to a larger website.

Dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, and Coffee Meets Bagel do not have an associated website, while conventional online dating sites (like Match) do.

Don’t be fooled into thinking that this is the only difference.

Learn what else you need to know about the difference between dating apps and online dating in this FREE class for people reenter the dating pool.

Dating apps are no longer just for hookups, and plenty of people use them to find meaningful relationships successfully.

Many people reentering the dating pool post-2014 feel confused about how to meet the right person using a dating app, not to mention afraid to set up a profile because of the stigma associated with apps like Tinder.

It’s 2017, my friend!

Not accepting that dating apps are no longer just for hookups is making you look and sound old.

Finding a new relationship is an adventure and you can quickly learn how to use dating apps to meet someone who wants to enjoy the delights of a committed relationship (like sharing quiet morning coffee and late night conversation) with you.

When you’re ready to meet the right person using dating apps, try the first class of my GROW formula for dating apps FREE here.

The first step to meeting someone who gives you the warm fuzzies is writing an inviting profile in the limited space allowed by dating apps. You’ll learn how to write a great profile in under an hour.

Included you’ll find:

  • Do’s and Don’ts for writing a great profile that makes starting a conversation easy and feels more natural
  • What photos to include (and not include) in your profile
  • The best order to arrange photos so they tell your story
  • How to spot someone just looking for a hookup so you don’t waste your time

If you find this FREE class helpful, the rest of the GROW formula will make your life so much easier and help you in using dating apps to meet someone who you can build a great relationship with much faster than you ever thought possible. Start by taking the free class here.

Love,

3 Tips to Writing an Online Dating Profile for Professionals

For the professional man or woman, posting an online dating profile can feel risky and far too revealing for comfort.

Can colleagues (or your ex!) potentially see your profile?

How much personal information can you share without risking appearing unprofessional?

What kinds of photos should you include?

Your answers are here.

Your Profile is NOT Private

The first thing you need to know is that you’ll have no control over who sees your online dating profile. Anyone who is participating in online dating, from a colleague, to an old flame, to your ex could potentially see your profile. There can be no reasonable expectation of privacy with online dating.

Don’t let that scare you away, but consider carefully what you’ll share and how you’ll share it.

Tip #1: Imagine your Grandmother seeing your profile. My profile shares plenty of personal details about me, but it contains nothing I would not be perfectly comfortable showing my grandmother (this includes my photos).

 

Your Profile is NOT a Résumé

The second thing you’ll need to consider when writing an online dating profile is who you are OUTSIDE of your career accomplishments.

Your professional accomplishments are a significant and important part of who you are, but when you’re out there in the dating world, remember you’re looking to connect with someone you want to spend your time away from the office with.

Not sure where to start?

Tip #2: Try sharing something you’re interested in learning about. How to cook a pot roast, how to fold a fitted sheet, what a meme is, or the next place you’d like to explore in the great wide world.

 

Your Photos Matter

Third, I know it’s tempting to hire a professional photographer to take photos of you for your online dating profile, but don’t. I could explain why, but just trust me on this one for now. Do NOT include your professional headshot or the photo from your badge either.

Tip #3: Be sure your profile includes a Selfie as well as a full body shot.

Bonus Tip: The order in which you arrange the photos in your profile will make a difference in how people perceive you (and the kind of matches you receive), so give some careful consideration to that as well.

 

Busy and Need Help?

If you’d like me to show you the best order in which to post your photos or help to optimize your profile so that you maintain your professional image (while maximizing your chances of meeting someone you can really connect with) you can hire me for that.

Send me an email here to find out how soon I can work you into my calendar and for information on pricing for each of these services.